I was afraid that yesterday, the anniversary of that fateful day, would cause me to go beyond remembering and relive the shattering emotions. Matt and I knew that we wanted to mark the day...but we also wanted to keep our minds busy so we volunteered at a local christian charity.
Well, our plans were thwarted. Yesterday (and the night before) was one of the biggest blizzards Chicago had ever experienced. Everything shut down...including the organization we had planned on volunteering at. Though for a moment, I panicked about having to face the whole day stuck in my house, my fear was quickly replaced with a childlike excitement about the snow day. After the gale force winds off of Lake Michigan died down, the snow in our neighborhood was incredibly beautiful to look at. As the peaceful blanket of white covered up the previously muddy streets and sidewalks, I was reminded how God can wash the muck of our lives - all the shame, the sorrows, the pain, the sins, etc - as white as snow. HE makes all things new!
I kept looking out our window with childlike wonder until after lunch Matt and I decided to don our snow gear and venture out on a walk through this winter wonderland. The sights we saw were simply amazing, but my favorite was a walk on the beach by our house. The powerful winds and snow created a scene like I had never seen before.
Between the amazing snow day, the incredibly sweet messages I received from so many friends and family, and the countless prayers of so many, I got through yesterday, and you know what, it was actually a good day! I remembered my sweet boy, Isaiah, but not with tears...with a smile.